Halloween Scene: The Ruins (2008)

Today’s been a pretty productive day. Well, maybe not in the actual, getting things done kind of way, but as far as the blog’s concerned. If only I got paid by the post. Heck, if only I got paid for this at all…

Anyway, in my effort to actually produce content on this bad boy and the great luck of having the house to myself thanks to a visit from the mother in law, I’ve been able to watch yet another horror movie today. This one, as you already know from the title, was The Ruins, a flick written by and based on the book of Scott B. Smith, directed by Carter Smith and starring five people, but Shawn Ashmore (Iceman!) and Jena Malone (Donnie Darko!) are the only ones I recognize (though I only actually noticed Jena Malone, I had no idea that was Iceman).

The premise is similar to Welcome to the Jungle which I thought I reviewed, but I just checked and I didn’t. Four American college kids decide it’s a good idea to leave their hotel and go with some dude they just met to some old Mayan ruins. One thing I’ve learned from watching plenty of horror movies is to never leave your hotel. Stay with the tourists man, they only get murdered in normal ways like stabbing and shooting, but getting eaten (Welcome to the Jungle) or killed by plants (The Ruins).

So these kids get to the ruins and immediately the natives show up and start screaming at them in a language they don’t understand. Once one of their dudes touches the plants surrounding the temple they shoot him with an arrow and then a gun. The kids freak out and run up the temple. This is where things get bad as the dude who took them there falls down the whole and breaks his legs. The other four try and deal with this completely illogical situation logically, but that doesn’t really work so well as the plants start entering their bodies, crawling around like creepy worms inside their skin and imitating human voices making them distrust each other (I’m not really sure how this works, but it’s creepy).

(SPOILER WARNING)
The last 20 minutes are pretty crazy as the main characters start dying off. The blonde girl got infected the worst so the brown haired kid who wants to be a doctor starts cutting the plant-worms out of her, but he doesn’t get them all so she decides to cut them out herself while everyone’s sleeping. And boy does she hack away at herself. It’s a great effect and super creepy (as was the part where they’re pulling out the plant worms). Iceman tries to stop her, but she stabs and kills him. She then begs the doc to kill her which he does. He then has this plan to get Jena out of there which works, but the natives kill him and she ’s got one of the plant worms in her head.

I liked the general concept of a temple trying to kill people and the natives being the real protectors, keeping the world safe from what I can only assume is an ancient evil and the dumb Americans being the bad guys. It’s worth checking out for horror fans as the characters are likable and the effects are great. Plus it’s only a little over an hour and a half so it doesn’t take all that much time. I’m not sure what it is, but the movie didn’t really grab me even with all that. Part of it is that it’s pretty dark when they’re inside the temple (they spend most of their time on top of it). I had very little idea what was happening when they were in there. Maybe it’s that I feel like I’ve seen this kind of movie before. It might be the non-committal ending with Jena Malone getting away to some extent. But who knows how far she got? I’d actually like to see a sequel explaining what happens after that or could have done with about 10 more minutes of story, but hey, what can you do?

What I’m Watching Part 2

One thing I recently realized is that there aren’t a whole lot of new shows coming out that I’m looking forward to. The new Christian Slater show looks pretty cool, so does Life on Mars, but they don’t start for a while. Mostly I’m excited for all the shows I dug last season to be back on.

THURSDAY

8:00-9:00

MY NAME IS EARL (NBC)

Earl started off the season with an hour long episode (just like The Office) and it was a good one. Earl ended up helping Seth Green, who, a few years ago was on the Make a Wish program. Earl stole the horse he was supposed to ride in a parade. Thinking Seth’s character had died, he tries to make it up to his mom, but she reveals that Seth is still alive. So, to cross Seth off his list, Seth asks if Earl will help him film his awesome action movie, to which Earl agrees and everyone in town does too. There’s a great scene where Randy (Ethan Suplee) does a number of different impressions, including a dead-on Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. Great stuff. There’s a lot of fun, on the fly super low-budget filmmaking and Seth Green was fantastic as the excited filmmaker. There’s a pretty sad ending (which you can probably guess if you think about it, though I didn’t see it coming until about 2 seconds before). But man, what a great episode to a great show.

9:00-10:00

THE OFFICE (NBC)

The Office is probably my favorite comedy on right now and definitely up there in my all time favorites (though the original is up there as well). As far as I’m concerned they’re pretty much separate animals by now. If you’re a fan, check out the deleted scenes on the DVDs for even more interviews with your favorite background characters (mine is Creed). The season premier had a lot of excellent moments. Spoilers ahead. The through story is that corporate offered the branch that loses the most weight three extra vacation days, so everyone’s trying to loose weight in different ways. So, unlike most episodes, this one takes place over a month instead of a day or two. Also during this time, Pam’s in New York for the summer for art school and Angela (who got engaged to Andy and caught banging Dwight in the season finale last year) continually gives Andy trouble in planning the wedding (though he’s so in love with her that he doesn’t care) and pages Dwight for secret trysts in a room in the warehouse. And the final, fist pumping super-spoiler is that Jim asks Pam to meet him halfway at a rest stop for lunch and proposes to her. I get giddy when stuff like this happens, so I’m looking forward to seeing how the rest of the season plays out.

SATURDAY

11:30-1:00

SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE (NBC)

As I mentioned before, I missed the previous two SNL episodes, but I was in last night and got to check it out. Anna Faris hosted and Duffy was the musical guest. As can be expected there were a number of political sketches, but I was impressed with the debate sketch because it didn’t seem to lean too much one way or the other. I think my favorite sketch involved Anna Faris and Keenan Thompson in a rowboat. I would link to it on Hulu, but it’s not on there unfortunately. I will say that there is singing, which I always enjoy.

I picked up Duffy’s record soon after it came out based solely on her first single “Mercy” which has been played to death on the radio (which is why I don’t listen to the radio anymore). Her performance was kind of weird. Her singing and her band were right on, but she had these weird sorta doo wop dance moves that came off as kind of robotic. Not sure what the deal was, if she was nervous or something, but it reminded me of when I saw Black Sabbath on their first reunion tour and Ozzy would do the same three or four things on stage over and over again.

I think this has been a pretty good period for SNL. The last few years have seen a bit of a shift in the kind of comedy they’re going for (thanks in large part, I think to Seth Meyers, Bill Hader, Jason Sudeikis, Andy Sandberg and plenty of writers I don’t really know about), so I’m looking forward to seeing what else they’ve got planned this year.

Halloween Scene: Halloween II (1981)

I’m not sure what’s happening to me, but I’m having trouble getting a full movie in starting at 11 PM anymore. I guess I’m starting to show my age. Because of that it’s taken me three days to actually Halloween II which was written by the original’s John Carpenter and Debra Hill and still starring Jamie Lee Curtis (the last one to do so until the continuity killing H20) and Donal Pleasence. This time though it’s directed by Rick Rosenthal who later directed a TV sequel to The Birds and a ton of TV including Buffy episodes “Help” and “Normal Again.”

H2 is one of the few horror sequels I can think of that picks up directly after the first one leaves off which either means it’s not that common or that I’m just highly forgetful, either seems possible. You even get the last few minutes of the original where Michael does his awesome sit-right-up scene that I love and Loomis coming in gun blazing with Michael falling out the window and disappearing. So, with this installment we get treated to the further adventures of that fateful Halloween night in Haddonfield. Laurie gets taken to the hospital while Loomis runs around town trying to find where Michael has gotten off to.

There’s a definite difference in feel between this and the originally. For one thing it’s a lot darker and harder to understand what’s going on at times. There’s also less of the POV stuff that I loved so much in the first one, but way way more fake-outs. I guess by 1981 people had seen a fair amount of slasher movies, so instead of kind of inventing the tropes, this one tries to play with them to not the greatest effect.

That being said, I do like this flick. It’s got my three favorite elements from the first, Donald Pleasence getting crazier than ever (until next time), Michael Myers (who’s in my top two favorite slashers with Leatherface) and Jamie Lee Curtis. Most of the action takes place in the hospital as Michael makes short but bloody work of the staff, but one of my favorite elements takes place outside as what looks like Michael Myers gets hit by a police car and catches fire. Pleasence and his policeman friend think it’s Michael for a little while. Yes, it’s a little convenient that someone dressed up exactly like the guy who went around killing a good number of the teenagers in town gets killed, but do remember that Michael swiped the mask from a local store so it’s not too too crazy. I just like the idea of them being at ease while Michael’s still out there killing folks. Also, the kid who dies was Bennett Tramer, the boy who Laurie had a crush on in the previous movie (he’s also named after a dude who would go on to work on Saved By The Bell!).

The hospital kills are pretty creative as Michael boils a woman alive in a hot tub (which I don’t think is possible), stabs a dude in the head with something, drains the blood out of a woman and others. But for some reason my favorite is when he stabs a nurse through with a scalpel and then lifts her up about two feet off the floor. She’s understandably shocked, then her shoes fall off and she finally crumples to the floor. There’s just something about the image that has stuck with me since the first time I watched since high school.

That particular kill removes that last other person in the hospital between Michael and Laurie. Laurie’s understandably messed up (I think there was something about a coma, but I can’t quite remember) so Michael does his usual slow walk chase as Laurie scrambles away. There’s something primaly unnerving about watching someone who’s already gone through so much craziness just barely able to elude her killer. It’s not the kind of thing that had me pulling my blanket over my eyes, but it’s the kind of thing that I do think about (probably too much).

Meanwhile, Loomis is driving around with a woman and a cop. He finds out about the hospital and freaks out on the cop, holding his revolver to the cop’s face and telling him to head to the hospital against his original orders. I love me some crazy Loomis. Once they get to the hospital, Laurie’s outside trying to get this dude in a car to drive her away, but the dude passes out or dies. She’s crawling through the parking lot as Loomis and Co. show up, but she doesn’t scream out for some reason until after they’re already in. I think I’m missing a fairly big piece of the story from falling asleep so many times, like maybe she was drugged up or something. Michael gets on Laurie’s trail again so she runs to the door, bangs on it and screams until Loomis lets her in. Michael gets shot a number of times, but of course, he’s not dead.

All of which leads to the ending which I actually like very much. Michael chases Loomis and Laurie into some kind of room where he has them cornered. Loomis gives Laurie a gun, but tries to shoot Michael with his which is empty, so Michael stabs him in the stomach. Loomis crumples to the floor and Michael goes after Laurie who’s crumpled on the floor. Laurie shoots Michael in the face, which doesn’t kill him or even knock him over but it does blind him, forcing him to swing around wildly. I really like this element of the movie because Myers spent the last two movies fairly calm and collected and now he’s acting like an animal, slashing the air. Loomis gets back up and opens up a nearby (what I assume) oxygen tank. Michael moves towards the sound away from Laurie so Laurie gets up and opens up even more tanks. Now Michael’s really going crazy, Loomis tells Laurie to run away, then busts out his lighter and blows the room up. Out in the hall, Laurie gets knocked down by the blast and the camera just focuses on the blaze for a while until Michael comes stumbling out. Holy crap! Then he falls to the ground and everything’s over (haha, right). The song “Mr. Sandman Bring Me a Dream” plays over a last minute show of Michael’s face and mask burning. A nice touch.

Here’s the thing that a lot of people don’t seem to get about the Halloween series. The first was made without expectations of of a sequel (as far as I know) and the second one was made to finish out the series. No more Michael Myers. Then something happened (I’m assuming enough money was thrown his way) and Carpenter decided to turn Halloween into a kind of anthology with a different horror movie every year, which is why 3: Season of the Witch has nothing to do with Michael Myers. Things didn’t go so well with that one so they switched back to Michael for part 4. Any horror fan worth their salt knows the deal, but I still hear people complaining about it, which is one of my big horror pet peeves. I guess I’m just a weirdo that way.

thrashing around blindly

“Mr. Sandman” playing over burning carcass

Newer Movie Round-Up

Just wanted to say a few quick things about three movies that I’ve seen recently and really enjoyed.

Sometime last week or the week before Em and I watched Baby Mama, starring Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Greg Kinnear, Steve Martin, Romany Malco and more. I am a big fan of Tina and Amy first from their work on SNL and later Fey on 30 Rock, Romany was awesome in 40 Year Old Virgin and I can’t wait for him to star in something on his own and Steve Martin is funnier in this as an aging hippy mogul that he’s been in anything I’ve seen in a while. The basic plot is that Tina Fey wants to have a baby, but she can’t so she goes through an agency and ends up with Amy Poehler as her surrogate. The plot itself is VERY formulaic (I had it nailed down about 20-ish minutes in), but it’s the performances that really make this movie worth watching. If you’re a fan of Poehler and or Fey, then it’s definitely worth checking out.

Then, just today we watched Speed Racer. I know it bombed in the box office, but I can’t for the life of me understand why. The Wachowski Brothers took a tired old cartoon that I generally disliked and turned it into this crazy mix of action and drama in a really effective live action cartoon. Oh, it also stars Christina Ricci who I’ve had a crush on since Casper. But really, I laughed and called out “Oh [bad word for poo]” off and on so many times during the 2 hour movie. Don’t believe the bad hype and check this flick out on DVD. Emile Hirsch, John Goodman, Susan Sarandon, Matthew Fox and Shaft himself Richard Roundtree all offer up fantastically believable performances even against the backdrop of this cartoony world. Plus, the chimp scenes in this movie are my second favorite next to Any Which You But Loose and its sequel. Big ups to the Wachowskis, I think there’s some kind of Hollywood conspiracy that kept this movie from doing well. A CONSPIRACY I tells ya!

Finally, tonight Em, her mom and I went to see the Coen Brothers’ latest flick Burn After Reading. It was 97 minutes of pure delight. Definitely more Lebowski than No Country. It was much funnier than I expected it to be (I actually didn’t really know what it was about going in, just that it was some kind of spy thriller). It’s also a pretty hard movie to summarize, so I won’t bother. Two of my favorite actors George Clooney and Brad Pitt were awesome, JK Simmons made me laugh so hard I almost watered up. And of course John Malkovich brought his A game. The Coen’s really wove an interesting yarn with this one, keeping me guessing as to what was going to happen next, but also challenging me to keep up with the story. Oh, I also really liked the poster. Well done, what a great week for movies.

Halloween Scene: Suspiria (1977)

Okay, so I’m watching Suspriria, Dario Argento’s most famous flick (according to something I read online or something) for the first time while I’m drinking my very first 40oz of Big Bear Premium Malt Liquor (thanks to whoever brought this to my house after Oktoberfest a few weeks ago). Now a great combination if you want to actually pay attention to the quintessential Italian horror director’s interpretation of an American at a German dance school.

I’ll be completely honest with you. I have no idea what’s going on in this movie. I am watching it as I write this and I’m probably about halfway through. I’m also fairly in my cups as some folks would say, so thank you again to Big Bear. I read on the interwebs that it’s about an American girl who goes to a German dance school and that Argento based the story on somebody’s stories of witchcraft going on at a dance school. Check IMDb if you want the actual “facts.”

Like I said before I have no freaking idea what’s happening in this movie. Partly because I was writing my Halloween review while watching it. Partly because I’m in my cups pretty bad (the 40’s about 70% empty). And partly because the volume of the freakin movie keeps changing from way-too-quiet to way to loud. Oh, also, I havne’t really been paying attention.

I DO know that I would never spend a second in any location in this movie. As soon as you see all kinds of crazy shapes and/or hallways that are primarily red, RUN. Go sleep on a parkbench. You’re better off in Haddonfield on October 31st cause some crazy Sh!t’s about to go down.

Okay, let me watch a little bit more and get back to you…holy crap, a girl just jumped into a room full of wound-up barbed wire and then got her throat slit. I still have no idea what’s going on (hopefully someone finds this intoxicated stream of consciousness movie review interesting).

Due to some exposition (thanks handsome guy!) we find out that the dance academy was founded by a witch who liked witchcraft AND dancing. They ditched the witchcraft and just stuck with the dance. Or DID THEY? (I’m still waiting to find out myself.)

Strange side note, while watching this flick from beginning to end there was a point where the DVD decided that it wanted to show me the rest of the movie (and the disc menu) in a weird, pixelated version that reminded me of the NES. Luckily I was able to skip ahead to a different chapter and avoid the problem, but it did prolong the watching of this nearly incomprehensible movie. I highly recommend NOT drinking a 40 or blogging while watching Suspiria. That being said, horror fans should check this thing out and then tell me what happened.

Okay, so I’m either going to fall asleep during the end of this movie, get woken up by something scary and go to bed OR actually finishing this thing out and then head to bed. Either way, I do recommend this flick to other horror fans who can someday explain to me what exactly this movie is about.

Thanks, have fun and don’t drink and drive, but do drink and and blog, it’s funner for everyone.

Halloween Scene: Halloween (1978)

Alright, in honor of Halloween I decided to move all the horror/scary movies in my Blockbuster queue up top. There’s about 30 movies now that I’m positive I won’t get through, plus a number that I already have (most of the pre-H2O Halloweens and the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre) or have recently ordered (the Friday the 13th box set which is on its way).

After really discovering horror movies at the age of 14 or 15 (when I could ride my bike up to the Family Video and they didn’t card me for R rated movies), Halloween became one of my favorite holidays and I would celebrate it with various horror-fests, usually on my own, but sometimes with friends. Well, my senior year in college I got bronchitis and penmonia so bad that I actually had to go home for Halloween which put a damper on things. Then, the next year, a mere two weeks after moving out to New York I didn’t get invited to a former co-worker’s Halloween party (an oversight I’m sure), so I spent it in my hovel of a room trying to cheer myself up with horror movies, which didn’t work too well. I can’t remember the year after that, but last year I got sick again, though not as bad. Well, this year, I’m not letting sickness get me down. I’m celebrating my favorite holiday the only way I know how, by watching a butt-ton of the best and worst horror has to offer.

To kick things off, I naturally started with Halloween, a true favorite and a very recent addition to my DVD collection (it wasn’t on sale last year when I picked up 2-5 on the cheap). I don’t remember the actual first time I watched Halloween, but I know it was in my room in high school and it freaked me the f-bomb out. It’s still in my Triumvirate of Terror (the other two being Jaws and Texas Chainsaw Massacre, which I’m sure I”ll get around to reviewing this week). Anyway, it still holds up 31 years later and still actually makes me jump in places (even watching it on a tiny laptop screen).

If you don’t know the story of Michael Myers, I’m not going to explain it to you, you should really just watch the movie. But I will get into what I love about it. First and foremost you have the brilliant directing done by John Carpenter. He would go on to work with bigger and better actors, but what he did for POV camera work in Halloween just can’t be undone or imitated quite as effectively. By giving the camera the killer’s perspective (or at least one very close the Myers, like right next to him) you actually get trained to be afraid of everything you see, because you’re not sure if you’re seeing events through the killer’s perspective or just your average camera angle. That builds an element of suspense and unease that continues throughout the movie and adds a sense of dread not found in many other movies, even the ones where the camera man is a character in the movie.

And speaking of Michael, damn, what a creepy figure he makes. That painted-over Shatner mask (look it up) paired with the simple blue jumpsuit and the gray station wagon have never, and will never, be creepier. Being able to take such simple, every day elements and making them terrifying is very impressive. But besides the general aesthetic, Carpenter absolutely mastered the timing of showing off Myers. Like in Jaws, you don’t get an eyeful of him all at once. He teases you with the killer throughout the first part of the flick and then you get these short, terrifying glimpses until the last 15-20 minutes when he’s giving Laurie the scare of her life.

The kills are great too. Myers plays with his victims, but doesn’t get overly orchestrated in his kills. He does seem to enjoy setting up his kills in various places. I really dig the one with Annie in the Jesus Christ pose on the bed with the headstone above her, but the other two do seem a little out there and time consuming. But I guess when you’re wandering through a neighborhood and icing teenagers, you’ve got all the time you need.

Another thing I love about Halloween is Jamie Lee Curtis. She’s just fantastic in this. She was about 20 when she made the flick, but I get the feeling that her and her friends are actual teenagers. Maybe it’s because of the time gap. I have no idea what real teenagers in the ’70s would have acted like, the performances could be completely off for all I know, but they FEEL genuine. Especially. PJ Soles and her boyfriend Bob. Oh and the little kids are great, if not a bit stiff, but sometimes the slightly wooden performances add to the realism of a movie for me. We’ve all met those people who just don’t know how to talk to other people.

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If Curtis hadn’t sold her performance so well, I don’t think the climactic scene would have been nearly as effective. You start off with her coming across her friends’ bodies, then freaking out like I do when I see a shadow that looks even remotely Michael Myers-shaped. Which of course leads to her running back to the kids she’s babysitting and Myers eventually following. And then you get three almost kill encounters, each one way scarier than the last until finally Loomis (geez, I haven’t mentioned Donald Pleasance once, have I?) jumps in and caps Myers right after we get a glimpse of his face (pay attention when he puts his mask back on and you can see the Michael Myers mask scrunching up under the Shatner mask). Of course he disappears at the very end and we’re left to hear his heavy, mask-restricted breathing as we get our last minute shots of the various locations in Haddonfield, Illinois.

Before I move on, I’ve got to say that one of my favorite scenes in movie history is the one towards the end after she stabs him in the closet where you see Lorie in the foreground and Michael sits up in the background. Damn. It doesn’t scare me like it did the very first time (because I know it’s coming), but it’s so damn creepy. He sits up like a robot!

Also Donald Pleasence is the man. He only gets crazier and crazier as the sequels roll out, but you do get a glimpse of his obsession with Michael here. From what I read he did his scenes in 5 days, which is pretty impressive.

Speaking of the sequels, none of them top the original, but I do have a special place in my heart for them. Seeing all these big new remakes come out puts a few tiny daggers in said heart because I know we won’t get a Halloween 7 (or 9 if you count H2O or Resurrection, which I don’t because they negate everything from 2-6). I also heard the Rob Zombie version was pretty terrible, though I did get to interview Danny Trejo because of it and he was my favorite interview of all time (so far).

One last word on the subject of Halloween. I actually don’t like being scared in real life, so even though I love horror movies, I’ve only been to one haunted house kind of thing. When I was in high school there were three under one roof in what used to be a Handy Andy or something like that. I picked the metaphorical last straw and ended up in the back of the line (not a good place to be) and ended up being followed by a guy dressed up like Michael Myers for the entire 10-15 minutes that it took us to walk through the thing. I’m not sure when he started, but I looked back, saw him and completely freaked out on the inside, but tried to keep my cool in front of my friends. I wanted to punch that dude SO bad. Luckily I didn’t, cause I don’t want to end up like Bob.

What I’m Watching

As you know, a new TV season is upon us once again. I’m halfway through the week that one of the networks is calling “National Stay At Home Week” so you can watch all their shows. And I tell you what, I love when the new TV season starts. I really do feel like a kid about to run into the toy store, there’s all kinds of potential, but then, most of the time I run in and the toys aren’t as cool as they looked on the commercials. So far, though, I’ve liked what I’ve seen so far.

Here’s a brief rundown of what I’ve been watching by day.

MONDAY

8:00-8:30
Big Bang Theory (CBS)

I’m not sure how many of you guys out there are watching this show, but it’s my favorite new show from last season. After moving over to ToyFare I was able to push for a feature based on it and had the pleasure of talking to a few people from the show (check out the finished product in ToyFare #134). It’s about these four geeky scientists and their interactions with their hot neighbor girl across the hall. At the end of last season Leonard asked Penny (the girl) out and she said yes, but this new season seems to be starting off with Penny’s insecurities dating someone who’s so smart. I really dug the season premiere and hope that they don’t get into a prolonged Ross and Rachel kind of thing, but I don’t think it’ll happen after talking to Executive Producer Bill Prady. If nothing else, just keep your eyes peeled for all kinds of great nerd gear in the background on the sets (especially DC-related products).

8:30-9:00
How I Met Your Mother (CBS)

Em and I got into HIMYM a little late in the game but went back and got caught up on DVD and it’s another great comedy show. The hook is that Bob Saget’s telling his kids in the future about how he met their mother, but it’s way more than just a gimmick as we weave in and out of main character Ted’s love life. Towards the end of last season Sarah Chalke of Scrubs fame joined the cast as Ted’s latest love interest-with-a-kid and now they’re engaged. But she’s not the kids’ mother, so there’s this fun sense of impending doom (trust me, it makes sense). Anyway, this season opened with Ted talking to his buddy Marshall (Jason Segel of Freaks and Geeks and Forgetting Sarah Marshall) and realizes that Ted doesn’t really know that much about his new fiance, chiefly that she’s never seen Star Wars. So Ted sits her down and makes her watch it because it’s his favorite movie and he’s not sure if he can marry a woman who hates Star Wars. The show also stars Alyson Hannigan, Cobie Smulders (Joss Whedon’s pick for Wonder Woman if his version would have been made) and the fantastic Neil Patrick Harris. They’re a fantastic cast and are a real joy to watch. Rent the DVDs, get caught up and check this show out.

9:00-10:00
Prison Break (FOX)

Thanks to FOX’s early start of their season, I’ve been enjoying new episodes of Prison Break for a few weeks now. A lot of people give me crap for liking Prison Break with the usual “are they STILL breaking out of a prison?” I’ve been completely unsuccessful in getting anyone I actually know to actually check the show out, but I can’t recommend it enough. The thing I love the most about Prison Break is that more happens in one episode than whole seasons of other shows. This season has had more game changing moments that I can’t even think of them all. The basic premise of this season is that the surviving guys who broke out of the prison in the first season are kind of a Dirty Dozen/Suicide Squad group of dudes who have been picked by the government to help them take down the shady Company. It’s pretty hard to sum up what’s going on, but I highly recommend this series to anyone who loves complex action stories where whole seasons’ worth of plot points happen over the course of a few episodes.

10:00-11:00
Boston Legal (ABC)

Em got me watching Boston Legal a season or two back and it really is a great show. William Shatner and James Spader star along with Candice Bergen and a slew of other super-talented folks. It’s a law show, but not your standard one as it balances between the lawyers’ interactions and the cases they’re working on. The relationship between Shatner and Spader is the kind that really embraces the idea of heterosexual lifemates and one that I can relate to. They end every episode smoking cigars and drinking out on their law office balcony. Sounds like a great way to end a day to me. Anyway, this season opened with Spader’s character going up against big tobacco and a lawyer that he used to have a relationship with. As usual, Spader makes a very compelling closing argument at the end of the episode that makes you think regardless of what side of the issue you stand. It’s worth checking out, especially because, even though storylines tend to weave throughout the season, you can catch random episodes and still usually know what’s going on.

TUESDAY

9:00-10:00
Fringe (FOX)

So far I’m digging Fringe. There’s been a lot of X-Files comparisons, but that doesn’t bother me much because I never watched X-Files regularly. Sure it’s the standard regular person teamed up with a federal agent scenario, but J.J. Abrams and Co. do a great job playing with the format and the actors are pretty fantastic. I’ve never seen Anna Torv in anything before, but she’s been pretty convincing as the person thrown into a crazy world roll without being a full-on Scully. Josh Jackson is fantastic as the fast talking smart guy, but there does seem to be potential for them to over do it. We shall see. Lost alumn Lance Reddick is great and creepy and John Noble plays the eccentric old man scientist to great effect. The show is centered around these weird occurrences that keep happening in the Boston area, most of which are related back to the old scientist’s experiments from back in the day. I find a lot of the pseudo science to be really interesting, plus the underlying mystery behind John Noble’s past and how it relates to mega-company Massive Dynamic will keep me coming back for the rest of this season.

WEDNESDAY

8:30-9:00
Gary Unmarried (CBS)

I became a fan of Jay Mohr a few months ago when I read his autobiography about his time at Saturday Night Live (which I have an unnatural love for) so I was pretty excited when I saw that he’s starring in a new sitcom. He plays a dude (Gary) who’s been divorced for three months, but his (SPOILER WARNING) wife is actually getting married to their marriage counselor played with great hippy dippy precision by Ed Begley Jr. He’s got two kids and is starting to date Jaimie King who also has a kid. I’m not 100% sold on this show and when Pushing Daisies comes back, I’ll probably switch back over to that, but if the next few episodes really bowl me over I’ll tape (yes TAPE) them.

10:00-11:00
The Island (MTV)

I am an immense fan of The Real World. It started when I was a kid and really got into the Miami and Boston seasons. Back then all I wanted was to get on the show and live my incredibly interesting life out in front of millions of people, which would have been great as I was a borderline agoraphobe back then and crowds still make me a little freaked out to this day. Anyway, I stuck with it and still watch every season and especially love the challenges. This season’s challenge is called The Island and it’s weird because there aren’t any group challenges, just three people competing against each other for a key to get them on a boat to sail to a smaller island where a treasure lies. The real reason I like these shows is because you get to keep seeing these crazy people years after their original shows. And yes, they’ve become characters to me in the same way that any other TV show has characters. I know they’re real people in the sense that they physically exist somewhere, but they’ve all become such charicatures that it’s really fantastic to keep getting glimpses into what’s become their lives: living for a few weeks in a rad topical place, backstabbing their friends, making alliances and getting absolutely sh!t faced (even when on an island with very little water, brilliant!). It’s like a soap opera but with real people! Oh, also, almost everyone in the game is terrible at playing the game. Put me on there and I’d run that island (assuming I could pull myself away from staring at Kellyanne and Robin, hey ladies )

And, this week, whenever I haven’t been watching the above shows I’ve been watching the British Office for the third time. I think it might be the perfect TV show. I’ll do a review when I finish (which will probably be tonight or tomorrow). I’m also excited about tonight’s American Office and My Name is Earl premieres nd can’t wait for 30 Rock to come back. Also, I’ve missed the first two SNLs, so I’m actually looking forward to this Saturday when nothing is going on and I can watch it (and for the eventual rereuns of the first two episodes, something I usually dread).

Calendars, Man

The rad folks over at Asgard Press dropped me an E-mail last week and asked if I wanted to check out their Vintage DC and MAD Magazine 2009, so OF COURSE I said yes (thanks again by the way). So here’s the deets. These 11×30 calendars go from September of this year through December of 2009. Each picture can be removed (the edges are perforated) so you could hang them up in your room or frame them if you’re classy and feature either classic DC or MAD covers from the old school. They cost $18.95 and get a super added bonus in my book for being printed on 100% recycled paper with soy based inks. I don’t know exactly what that means, but it’s good for the Earth right?

I’m definitely not as familiar with MAD as I am with golden and silver age DC comics, but I can definitely see why this calendar would be a treat for any fans of MAD. My personal favorite in the bunch is actually from this month originally printed as the cover to MAD #105 from September 1966. It features a painting by Norman Mingo of an Adam West Batman and Alfred E. Newman as Robin. Good stuff.

Each month, in addition to the huge piece of art you also get thumbnail sized reprints of various pages from the feature issue as well as the back covers and the name of each artist.

Okay, so on to the big whammy, the Vintage DC Super Heroes 2009 Calendar which feature 16 rad reproductions of the first appearances of Barry Allen as the Flash, the Justice League, Batgirl, Supergirl, Wonder Woman and the JLA/JSA crossover. There’s also some surprise picks like Captain Marvel #6, a cover I’m not sure if I’ve ever seen before and some great, campy holiday-related covers, my favorite being Superman’s Girlfriend Lois Lane #1 with Lois Flying around on a broom and Superman wondering “Great guns! Lois has supernatural powers–and they may prove mightier than mine!” Great stuff. Each month also gives a brief description of the contents of the issue along with general info. This calendar is perfect for any fan of DC comics who wants to keep all his dates in order, maybe even as an early holiday gift .

The Book of Oa: Sinestro Corps War

Wow, I completely suck for not posting in so long, hopefully this long-ish post will make up for it. This one’s for you Farooq.

I recently reread the entire Sinestro Corps War saga in the three hardcovers that DC has put out (Vol. 1, 2 and Tales of the Sinestro Corps) and dammit all if this isn’t one of the best comic book stories of all time. Geoff Johns helmed this epic with the help of fellow GL writers Dave Gibbons, Pete Tomasi and Ron Marz while artists like Ethan Van Sciver, Ivan Reis, Patrick Gleason and others drew the heck out of it.

GREEN LANTERN: THE SINESTRO CORPS WAR VOL. ONE

Johns and Gibbons both seeded elements of this tale in both Green Lantern and Green Lantern Corps, but this is where all that craziness goes on, starting with one of my favorite one shots of all time the Green Lantern: Sinestro Corps War one-shot which shows the Sinestro Corps waging war on the Green Lantern home world of Oa. There’s even a super patient Yellow Lantern who hid in an asteroid field just so that he could bust out and snipe the crap out of some GLs. There’s a real sense of “how the heck are the going to get out of this?” But before all that, the GL that will always have a soft place in my heart, Kyle Rayner, gets sucked the Qward where he gets infected with Parallax, the embodiment of fear (oh yeah, whereas the GLs represent willpower, the YLs represent fear on the emotional spectrum).

But the craziness doesn’t stop there (and neither does the issue). As the Sinestros slaughter the GLs (who can’t kill anyone with their rings) we find out that Superboy Prime (yeah, I called him SuperBOY Prime and I’m not gonna stop) and Cyborg Superman are on Sinestro’s side. And, as readers of GL will remember, Cyborg’s actually in charge of the Manhunters, the Guardians’ first crack at a police force (though robotic instead of “human”). But that’s not the biggest kicker. That boot belongs to the fact that their guardian is actually the Anti-Monitor. Now, they don’t really get into an explanation as to how the heck AM is still alive after Crisis on Infinite Earths, but they do mention something like “When the universe redid itself, we found him.” Hey, it’s good enough for me.

Okay, that’s the end of the first issue. Personally, I think the set up for all of this, which was inspired by Alan Moore’s BRILLIANT “Darkest Night” story which you can find in one of my favorite trades of all time: DC Universe:The Stories of Alan Moore. Bringing back Cyborg as leader of the Manhunters and incorporating Superboy Prime (who was involved with Countdown, but seriously, who was reading that?) just made so much sense. I love when creators actually do something with older characters that have been forgotten that were important at one time (like Prime was prior to Infinite Crisis).

And Ethan Van Sciver’s can’t be ignored. Like with Green Lantern: Rebirth, Ethan just kills it. He also continues one of my favorite elements of Geoff and Ethan’s reboot: the different ways the the GLs use their rings. Kilowog and Guy are like forces of nature, Kyle’s very artistic and John Stewart, the engineer that he is, designs all of his constructs from all their parts. Additionally, you’ve got nine splash pages and spreads that blow my mind, especially the spread of the Yellow Lanterns on Qward. Just sick.

Okay, so it’s not all one issue. After fending off the SC’s first attack, the Guardians decide to destroy the Blackest Night chapter of the Book of Oa which carries the prophecy of how the Corps will fall, causing a rift between Ganthet and Sayd and the other Guardians. Ganthet and Sayd appear to Hal Jordan via his ring and tell him he needs to be the leader of the Corps again, Hal doesn’t know how the others will take that, but he doesn’t really have time to think about it as the Parallax being (who was reinserted into the main battery) grabs Hal, Guy (my second favorite GL) and John Stewart to Qward where Hal rumbles with the Parallax-possessed Kyle.

There’s also a quick aside in the GLC book where Sinestro visits his homeworld of Korugar, the planet that he ruled with an iron fist when he was a GL (which is exactly what he got banished for) to meet Soranik Natu, the current GL from Korugar. Though it seems like kind of a throwaway issue, it’s not because we get more insight into Sinestro’s motives. He’s actually challenging the GLs with his Corps in order to make the GLs more effective. The big storypoint in this issue is that GL partners-but-not-really Stel (a robot) and Green Man realize that the Sinestro Corps is leading an attack against Mogo, the living planet GL. Holy crap!

From here on out the story is split between Hal fighting Kyle, trying to free him from Parallax, the Lost Lanterns joining in and the other GLs fighting on Mogo. But we also find out why Cyborg’s involved in all this: he wants to die and the Anti Monitor claims he can make it happen. We also get a creepy page of Superboy Prime sitting on the moon just waiting and watchign Earth. More on that later. The moments where Hal’s trying to help Kyle are really great to me because I actually started reading GL when Hal went crazy and destroyed the Corps and Kyle was the one and only. There’s something really cool about the two characters that a lot of fans never thought they’d see together (and definitely not on the same side) in reversed roles: Kyle’s the bad guy and Hal’s trying to help him. I also really like the Lost Lanterns because I really liked those guys and it makes me feel better about watching Hal’s exploits when I know that he didn’t really kill the only other GLs I knew about.

Of course, the Lost Lanterns don’t really see it that way as most of them still hold a grudge against Hal who they’re now forced to work with as they run for their lives on Qward as their batteries run out of juice and they try to find Guy and John.

Now we move on to the crazy fight on Mogo as the GLs defend him against an evil living city with a mad on for Guy (even though he’s nowhere near Mogo) full of 100 Yellow Lanterns which starts off with just Stel and Green Man standing between Mogo and the Sinestro Corps. Of course, Kilowog and company join up with them and put up a heck of a fight. The living city is actually pretty hilarious as it continues to whine about Guy Gardner, demanding his presence and death. There’s a whole lot of craziness going on, most of which I don’t want to get into, but the Sinestro Corps is basically trying to kill Mogo because he figures out where the rings go to after a Lantern dies. He’s also the soul of the GLC and, of course, the biggest member.

Another subplot I forgot to mention is that the Guardians tasked Arisia with keeping Sodom Yat safe. They’re not sure why he’s important, but anyone who read Alan Moore’s story knows that Sodom will be the savior of the GLC. Awesome! There’s also a big fight between Kilowog and his opposite member in the SC Arkillo, a weird toothy monster. They duke it out pretty bad, but they don’t finish until later.

The last issue of the first hardcover ends with Guy and John free, Hal sucking energy out of yellow lanterns, Ganthet and Sayd getting banished from the Guardians, the Anti-Monitor killing Lost Lantern Ke’Haan (Jack Chance got killed in an earlier issue) and the kicker of the Guardians telling the GLC about the first of the new ten laws: they can kill memebrs of the Sinestro Corps. There’s a lot I like about this issue. Of course, John and Guy getting back in the game is awesome. Also, Hal conquering the yellow lanterns is rad because it proves that he’s over the fear that poisoned him. The deaths of these characters also really got me. I’m not sure if it’s because of the older GL stories I’ve read or because Geoff had made them such interesting characters or if I just freaking love Green Lanterns so much that the death of any recognizable one gets me. I’m a softy that way. Finally, the first new rule makes a lot of sense. I mean, the Green Lanterns are cops, they should be able to ice the bad guys when necessary. Of course, there’s more to it than that as we’ll find out later on.

GREEN LANTERN: THE SINESTRO CORPS WAR VOL. TWO

So this book starts with the Green Lanterns saving Mogo in a cool way that, again, would take a while to explain and seeing as how this is already a pretty long post, I’ll skip it, but add that it was really cool (living planets who are GLs are always cool). From there we find out that the Yellow Lanterns actual target is Earth, the base of them multiverse. I’ve probably used the word “craziness” more than I should, but this is when the sh!t really hits the fan (it’s all kinds of craziness).

Oh man, I haven’t mentioned the other artists. Ivan Reis and Patrick Gleason do amazing jobs with the big splash pages and smaller moments. My facorite Reis spread in the whole series is the one in GL #24 as Superboy Prime leads Sinestro, Cyborg and a legion of Yellow Lanterns over the moon with a huge yellow Warworld behind them. I get chills. You could do a whole poster book out of Sinestro Corps War and I would cover my walls with it.

Okay, so the war has hit Earth in full force which means the superheroes we (at least I) all know and love get involved in the war. But before he can get into it, Hal’s got to save his brother’s family from Kyle-Parallax who actually switches to a crazy yellow version of his costume (this story has great costumes). But you just can’t keep my favorite lantern dawn as he finally fights his way out of Parallax’s grasp and shirks the fear-thing.

Then, BAM, Ganthet and Sayd are there and trap Parallax in Kyle, Hal, John and Guy’s lanterns. There’s a great moment where all four Earth Lanterns light themselves up and they’re ready to rumble. The GLs who were fighting on Mogo finally get to Earth as lead by Kilowog Salaak who has a great bit of business where he tells everyone to fix the damage done to their uniforms. “Use the time to regenerate your uniforms. We’re CORPS. Be PROUD.” After reading that I pumped my fist and shout “[EXPLETIVE] YEAH!”

And it wasn’t the last time as Arkill and Kilowog face off AGAIN, this time it’s even more brutal. Oh, this is a great time to mention this, even though the GLs can now kill the YLs, it doesn’t mean that they all do. Some go crazy Rambo-style, which is all well and good, but others, like Kilowog, choose not to, using their rings in other ways to incapacitate their enemies.

Oh, remember that Sodom Yat guy I mentioned? Well, he became the new Ion, which is a Lantern that doesn’t need to wear a ring. He’s also extra powerful. Plus he’s from the planet Daxam which means he’s got Superman-level abilities. Well, he’s the dude that throws down with Prime. We get some history about Yat while Superboy pummels him, but our hero doesn’t give up, he keeps fighting until Prime almost kills him.

Which brings us to the last issue. Damn, it’s another beauty. In the middle of this huge war, we get a look at the other colors of the emotional spectrum and what they represent, drawn by Ethan while Ivan handles the rest of the art chores.

As far as conclusions go, this is one of the best as it keeps the insanity going to the very end as the insanity ramps up continuously. You’ve got the Anti Monitor and Prime wreaking havoc on Earth’s heroes and the GLs, Guy getting sick with Despotellis the living virus whose killed entire planets, the Guardians jumping in and fighting the Anti-Monitor, dozens and dozens of Yellow and Green Lantern deaths, Hal and Kyle throwing down with Sinestro, using Warworld to destroy Cyborg and Anti-Monitor, Anti-Monitor coming back only to get supposedly killed by Prime (he’s still pissed about AM killing his home world, go figure), one Guardian giving his life to destroy Prime and finally Hal and Kyle defeating Sinestro in a fair, no-ring fist fight. Whew, it’s crazy awesome and I’m tired just explaining it all.

But even THAT’S not the end as we got some more Van Sciver-drawn bits. We see Superboy waking up somewhere saying “Oh my gosh. It’s really back.” Sinestro in GL jail, proud of the changes he caused in the Corps. His goal was to get the GLs to actually instill fear and thus be all the more effective against the evils of the universe. THEN, we see Ganthet and Sayd become the Guardians or something for the Blue Lanterns which represent hope and they create the first blue ring. After that those damn Manhunters find Cyborg’s dead body and reboot it, resulting in a heartbreaking tear trickling down his face. And FINALLY, we see the Anti Monitor’s corpse landing somewhere and getting trapped inside the black lantern.

Jeez, I forgot there’s a-whole-nother GLC issue that acts as a prologue. This is mostly a clean up issue that stars the featured players of the GLC book, which you should definitely check out. I’m especially partial to the scene where Rannian GL Vath takes a shot for each of his fallen comrades which number more than 432. It’s a touching moment that shows how one warrior deals with the loss of so many of his friends and fellow soldiers.

As if that weren’t all there’s also an interview with the creators in the back accompanied by sketches from the artists. I haven’t read it yet, but I’m always in support of beefing up trades with extra stuff you couldn’t get in the single issues. Otherwise, what’s the point?

Oh jeez, I completely forgot a few things. First of all, Natu used a sentient smallpox GL to defeat the evil virus Sinestro Corpsman inside of Guy. I was actually pretty nervous during this whole scene because it wouldn’t have surprised me if Geoff killed off one of the big GLs (I’m really glad he didn’t).

Now, like I said in the very beginning I love this story. Some people say that Geoff doesn’t end stories well and I can’t agree with that, especially when it comes to TSCW. The War definitely ends, for now at least, while still leaving the threat out there. It’s like in Star Wars, just because Vader and Palpatine are dead, doesn’t mean the Empire just crumbles. You also get to see Sinestro in prison again, which seems to be exactly where he wants to be. There’s all kinds of other lead-ins to future stories as well. I know that Geoff has said the he considers Rebirth the first chapter of his GL epic, this is the middle and then there will be Blackest Night when that hits next year (I think). But that doesn’t mean the regular series post-TSCW is boring. Geoff and Co. have gone into further development of the characters as well as the emotional spectrum and the new lanterns. Personally, I can’t wait to see where the rest of the story goes and what happens with the Blackest Night.

Finally, I know there’s also a Tales of the Sinestro Corps book, which I also read, but that with be another review because I’m tired.

Whew.

Over The River and Through The (Brian) Wood(s)

Parentheticals are fun aren’t they? Yeah it’s the best I could come up with after I realized I had just read two Brian Wood books one after the other. As far as I know DEMO and The New York Four were actually the first of his comics that I’ve ever read. What did I think? You know the drill…

DEMO

Written by Brian Wood
Drawn by Becky Cloonan

About two years back now (maybe more) I remember some of the more indie-minded guys at Wizard talking about DEMO, it even made its way into the mag if I remember correctly. Anyway, the recently released Vertigo trade collects the 12 original issues which were originally published by AiT/Planet Lar in all their black and white glory, though apparently not the back-up stuff that was in the original issues. Each issue has a single, self-contained story about people with powers.

For the most part, I dug this book. The individual issues are pretty quick reads, Cloonan does a good job of mixing up her art style with each issue, ranging from cartoony to real and more mainstream comics to manga. I especially liked “Bad Blood” which follows a pair of reunited step-siblings as they mourn their father and learn about their powers. I don’t want to give anymore away.

I think for someone who hasn’t read a lot of superhero comics, this collection will seem like a huge departure from what they think of as superhero comics. There’s stories about people dealing with their powers after accidentally killing or hurting people, super powers and relationships, dealing with dead loved ones, even a girl who looks like the most beautiful girl in the world to whoever’s looking at her. I gotta say, I’ve seen these kinds of stories, not that that takes away from them, just that it’s not the first time I’ve seen them. Overall I liked the book, though I’m not sure if I would recommend it to everyone.

THE NEW YORK FOUR

Written by Brian Wood
Drawn by Ryan Kelly

I would however, recommend The New York Four from DC’s Minx line to anyone and everyone. I really dug this story about a super-shy, text-obsessed freshman at NYU who finds herself becoming social for the first time in her life, making friends and reuniting with her long lost sister just before getting into a relationship with a guy she’s never met in person.

I can’t quite relate to the girl as far as all the texting stuff goes (can’t stand the stuff myself), but I could definitely relate to her shyness. I was pretty shy when I went to college not knowing anyone, though nowhere near as bad as Riley. Of course, I didn’t go to college in New York, I’m nearly positive I would have gone insane, so it’s nice of Wood to actually include little NYC 101 facts as the story progresses giving details along with his opinions on a lot of places I’ve heard about but still never been to.

I also really liked Ryan Kelly’s art. He deftly combines the emotions of each character (quite a feet, considering Wood’s populated this graphic novel with plenty of distinct, unique, yet familiar characters) with the background of a city that we’ve all seen in hundreds of TV shows and movies (or was that Toronto?).

The New York Four is about more than just one girl’s battle with shy-ness. There’s also the mystery of whether she’ll actually ever meet her cyber boyfriend, why her parents disowned her older sister, what will become of the house that she told her newfound friends they can rent to get out of the dorms and why Lona keeps taking pictures of her professor. All of those are answered except the last one, though the book ends with “See You Next Semester” so hopefully Wood and Kelly will team back up to tell us the further adventures of The New York Four.

I do have to say, for the people that read the book, I called the twist ending a few pages before it happened, though that’s the best place to call it, isn’t it? It means that he seeded it well enough throughout the story, but that you didn’t figure it out too soon. So either Wood did some very good pacing with the right hints at the right time or I’m super smart. Let’s go with both.

Seriously, go buy this book, it’s 152 pages of story for $10! Plus, you can hand it to a norm* and they’ll enjoy it too.

*norm=non geek